This I Believe

Love is a renewable resource, a self-fulfilling prophecy.
The more you love, the more you love.
This can be hard to feel, and even harder to believe. Love is magic.
It works regardless of whether you can feel it, 
Regardless of whether you believe in it or not.

Being kind is underrated.
Being right is overrated.
When in doubt, choose kindness.
Especially to yourself.

(Go slow and you’ll get there faster. Baby steps will take you farthest.)

About Motherhood

Motherhood is the hardest job on the planet.
Even if you climbed Mt. Everest, you know kids can challenge you more than the tallest peaks.
Miraculously, unbelievably, (thankfully) this is somehow, all worth it.
But why does this have to be so hard?

My kids are the best kids ever. And so are yours.
The fact that they can drive us crazy is beside the point.

Kids, especially toddlers, are physicists and social scientists.
They test the limits of gravity, safety, and patience.
They yank our chains for a living.
This ain’t easy on the mom.

Yelling at children is unavoidable.
Striving to yell less is important, learning grump-management is helpful, but let’s not kid ourselves, raising our voices at our loved ones is not about to go extinct.
Giving ourselves permission to yell when we are at the end of our rope just might keep yelling from turning into screaming.

Hugs are more important than food.
If we hug our kids more often than we yell at them, all of us will turn out alright.

(Baby steps will take you farthest.)

About Postpartum Mood Disorders

You are not broken.
You are not damaged.
You are struggling.
Every struggle is an opportunity for growth.

You don’t have to like this to survive this.
You don’t have to like this to learn and grow from this.
This sucks, so of course you don’t like this.
You have a right to be angry. How could you not be?
You have a right to be scared.

When you allow your anger and fear to be heard, they cannot rule you.
Interacting with them gives you power in situations you don’t have power over. Running away from your emotions means that you can never rest.

If you fight your anger tooth and nail, it will turn into rage and guilt.
If you fear your fear, it will turn into anxiety and panic.
Fighting your emotions only feeds your demons.

Healing cannot happen in a war zone.
Permission-Based Healing is far more effective.

You are not lazy.
You are exhausted.
So is your partner.

Until you get enough sleep, try to respect your capacity, or lack thereof.
Accepting that being grumpy is unavoidable helps.
It is possible to be grumpy without being mean.
Yes, this is hard.

Trust turns caves into tunnels.
When you can’t find the light at the end of your tunnel, dare to ask someone to light a candle and hold your hand.

Asking for help is hard. Very hard. And scary.
And it is the first step to recovery.
If you only learn one thing from having to deal with this darn mood disorder, let it be how to ask for help effectively.
No, you will not be good at this right away. And that’s OK.

(Baby steps will take you farthest.)

About the Role of Community in Recovery:

Community is my favorite word.
I wouldn’t be alive without my family and my community.

Every single person has skeletons in their closet.
Well, these things only look like skeletons, because it’s so dark in there.
When we dare to bring them out into the light, we discover that the skeletons are simply our very human, very scared selves.
Inviting our scared selves out to play can be petrifying.
Sharing our scary stories with others creates community while connecting all of us on the deepest level.
In my experience such trust is always rewarded handsomely.

This is how we trust in the healing power of community.
When we allow ourselves to be vulnerable and human, we allow others to do the same. And we all get stronger together.

Words build community.
When fighting doesn’t bring peace, writing does.
I believe every one of us is capable of writing for healing.
Not ready to write yet?
Read. Speak. Cry. Sing…

(Baby steps will take you farthest.)

 

I am grateful for the magic of the internet for letting us (you, me, and countless others) be here for each other. Lucky we.

I invite you to connect with me right here. Your comments are music to my ears, your questions help me chart the course, your responses keep me going.

I wish I could hug every single one of you.
Until we meet someday,

I’ll give and take as many hugs across the miles as I possibly can.
I often find myself tweeting “Hugs for the Hard.”
Use the #ppdchat hashtag, and you will connect to the most supportive community twitter has to offer. 

I hope you’ll keep in touch with me on twitter and on facebook.
If you want to read my words in the comfort of your inbox, go to those sign up boxes on the right sidebar and subscribe to the monthly Love Letter for moms. You can also sign up to get new blog posts via email.

And I would absolutely love, (love!) to hear your voice on our next PPD SpeakEasy support phone chat: a free, confidential, and loving conference call, where mothers from near and far get to hear each other’s voices and stories. Each call is proof that you are not the only freak in town struggling with motherhood, and there is nothing quite like chatting with other mothers who “get it.”  Join us at http://www.ppdtojoy.com/support/speakeasy-call/

As always, buckets of love to all who read.
Whether you comment, subscribe, follow, or not, may the joy be with you. 

 

 

 

One Response to This I Believe
  1. iron Force hack
    September 22, 2014 | 7:31 pm

    Hi there I am so thrilled I found your weblog, I really found you
    by mistake, while I was looking on Yahoo for something else, Nonetheless I am
    here now and would just like to say thanks a lot for a tremendous post and
    a all round enjoyable blog (I also love the theme/design),
    I don’t have time to read it all at the moment but I have book-marked it and also added in your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will
    be back to read a great deal more, Please do keep up the superb work.
    iron Force hack recently posted..iron Force hack

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This I Believe

Love is a renewable resource, a self-fulfilling prophecy.
The more you love, the more you love.
This can be hard to feel, and even harder to believe. Love is magic.
It works regardless of whether you can feel it, 
Regardless of whether you believe in it or not.

Being kind is underrated.
Being right is overrated.
When in doubt, choose kindness.
Especially to yourself.

(Go slow and you’ll get there faster. Baby steps will take you farthest.)

About Motherhood

Motherhood is the hardest job on the planet.
Even if you climbed Mt. Everest, you know kids can challenge you more than the tallest peaks.
Miraculously, unbelievably, (thankfully) this is somehow, all worth it.
But why does this have to be so hard?

My kids are the best kids ever. And so are yours.
The fact that they can drive us crazy is beside the point.

Kids, especially toddlers, are physicists and social scientists.
They test the limits of gravity, safety, and patience.
They yank our chains for a living.
This ain’t easy on the mom.

Yelling at children is unavoidable.
Striving to yell less is important, learning grump-management is helpful, but let’s not kid ourselves, raising our voices at our loved ones is not about to go extinct.
Giving ourselves permission to yell when we are at the end of our rope just might keep yelling from turning into screaming.

Hugs are more important than food.
If we hug our kids more often than we yell at them, all of us will turn out alright.

(Baby steps will take you farthest.)

About Postpartum Mood Disorders

You are not broken.
You are not damaged.
You are struggling.
Every struggle is an opportunity for growth.

You don’t have to like this to survive this.
You don’t have to like this to learn and grow from this.
This sucks, so of course you don’t like this.
You have a right to be angry. How could you not be?
You have a right to be scared.

When you allow your anger and fear to be heard, they cannot rule you.
Interacting with them gives you power in situations you don’t have power over. Running away from your emotions means that you can never rest.

If you fight your anger tooth and nail, it will turn into rage and guilt.
If you fear your fear, it will turn into anxiety and panic.
Fighting your emotions only feeds your demons.

Healing cannot happen in a war zone.
Permission-Based Healing is far more effective.

You are not lazy.
You are exhausted.
So is your partner.

Until you get enough sleep, try to respect your capacity, or lack thereof.
Accepting that being grumpy is unavoidable helps.
It is possible to be grumpy without being mean.
Yes, this is hard.

Trust turns caves into tunnels.
When you can’t find the light at the end of your tunnel, dare to ask someone to light a candle and hold your hand.

Asking for help is hard. Very hard. And scary.
And it is the first step to recovery.
If you only learn one thing from having to deal with this darn mood disorder, let it be how to ask for help effectively.
No, you will not be good at this right away. And that’s OK.

(Baby steps will take you farthest.)

About the Role of Community in Recovery:

Community is my favorite word.
I wouldn’t be alive without my family and my community.

Every single person has skeletons in their closet.
Well, these things only look like skeletons, because it’s so dark in there.
When we dare to bring them out into the light, we discover that the skeletons are simply our very human, very scared selves.
Inviting our scared selves out to play can be petrifying.
Sharing our scary stories with others creates community while connecting all of us on the deepest level.
In my experience such trust is always rewarded handsomely.

This is how we trust in the healing power of community.
When we allow ourselves to be vulnerable and human, we allow others to do the same. And we all get stronger together.

Words build community.
When fighting doesn’t bring peace, writing does.
I believe every one of us is capable of writing for healing.
Not ready to write yet?
Read. Speak. Cry. Sing…

(Baby steps will take you farthest.)

 

I am grateful for the magic of the internet for letting us (you, me, and countless others) be here for each other. Lucky we.

I invite you to connect with me right here. Your comments are music to my ears, your questions help me chart the course, your responses keep me going.

I wish I could hug every single one of you.
Until we meet someday,

I’ll give and take as many hugs across the miles as I possibly can.
I often find myself tweeting “Hugs for the Hard.”
Use the #ppdchat hashtag, and you will connect to the most supportive community twitter has to offer. 

I hope you’ll keep in touch with me on twitter and on facebook.
If you want to read my words in the comfort of your inbox, go to those sign up boxes on the right sidebar and subscribe to the monthly Love Letter for moms. You can also sign up to get new blog posts via email.

And I would absolutely love, (love!) to hear your voice on our next PPD SpeakEasy support phone chat: a free, confidential, and loving conference call, where mothers from near and far get to hear each other’s voices and stories. Each call is proof that you are not the only freak in town struggling with motherhood, and there is nothing quite like chatting with other mothers who “get it.”  Join us at http://www.ppdtojoy.com/support/speakeasy-call/

As always, buckets of love to all who read.
Whether you comment, subscribe, follow, or not, may the joy be with you. 

 

 

 

One Response to This I Believe
  1. iron Force hack
    September 22, 2014 | 7:31 pm

    Hi there I am so thrilled I found your weblog, I really found you
    by mistake, while I was looking on Yahoo for something else, Nonetheless I am
    here now and would just like to say thanks a lot for a tremendous post and
    a all round enjoyable blog (I also love the theme/design),
    I don’t have time to read it all at the moment but I have book-marked it and also added in your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will
    be back to read a great deal more, Please do keep up the superb work.
    iron Force hack recently posted..iron Force hack

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Wanting to leave an <em>phasis on your comment?

Notify me of followup comments via e-mail. You can also subscribe without commenting.

Trackback URL http://www.ppdtojoy.com/this-i-believe/trackback/